If You’re Hungry, Don’t Grocery Shop, and If You’re Lonely, Don’t Date!
“The full soul loatheth an honeycomb;but to the hungry soul, every bitter thing is sweet.”
-Proverbs 27:7
Being empty clouds your judgement.
If you’re lonely, your heart overlooks all red flags, all obnoxious behavior, and all unhealthy tendencies, just like a hungry stomach overlooks the poor quality of the chips and the fattening calories and saturated fat in fast food. Ever notice how good something tastes when you’re starving, even things that you normally loathe. The same is true when you feel lonely and starved for company and companionship.
Fill up on You
It is truly necessary that you master the art of NOT feeling lonely and empty WITHOUT being in a relationship for a few, very important reasons:
1.) Being happy and content puts you in a place emotionally, where you can objectively and clearly judge whether or not someone is good for you. It doesn’t take much to please a lonely person. That’s why lonely people tend to always settle for less than what God has for them.
2.) Filling up on the company of the wrong people feels really good and fulfilling at first, just like filling up on junk food tastes really good when you’re hungry. But soon after, you feel sick and find yourself carrying around unwanted weight with both.
3.) Filling up on you, being your best friend, learning to enjoy your own company puts you in a place where you are happy, full, and enjoy life. A happy person doesn’t tolerate the company of people who takes away their happiness and contentment. But, if you’re not happy and content, there’s no contrast between your current, messed up state, and the messed up state the wrong person brings to your environment. If you’re in a really low place, and are in the danger zone when it comes to not mastering the art of being in love with your own company, a person’s bad presence may even be better than your extremely bad presence. I pray that’s not you. But, if it is, you need to break off all ties and get full of yourself asap.
4 Steps To Being Full of Yourself
Step 1.) Make a commitment to do what you love, by yourself for a set amount of time everyday.
Step 2.) Take the time to look good and feel good for YOU. Place yourself in a state of gratitude. Think of it as showing God how grateful you are for his creation of you. Be so grateful that you want to show gratitude by taking the best care of yourself possible. Let gratitude be your motivation opposed to pleasing someone.
Step 3.) Take the time to audibly thank God for everything you love about yourself. If you can’t think of much, or anything at all, pray to God to increase your self-esteem to be a healthy, balanced self-esteem.
Step 4.) Pray to God to condition your heart to be content with Him and you alone.
Being Comfortable & Happy Alone, Is A Mandatory Step In The Healing Process
If you can’t stand to be by yourself, you need to work on yourself. I’m not saying it necessarily means that you are a horrible person, or have some horrible characteristics. At the least, I’m saying something is wrong with not being aware of how awesome you are. I’m saying something is wrong if you haven’t reached a place where you feel God’s presence enough that you don’t have co-dependency issues. Don’t get me wrong. Companionship is good for the soul. But, it only is a gift to both people if both people are healthy, complete and whole individually. Do not be deceived. Two people who are only 50% whole do not make a 100% union. They only make a union of two incomplete people. So, follow steps 1-4 above and get full of yourself starting today.
May you be blessed and healed.
Love,
~Shel